Pharon, the Goblin

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E.L.F. #0, "Pharon, the Goblin"

11x14 in., 1999

Ink, Pencil

(Just in case this is hard for you to see, I'll tell you what you're looking at. All you can see of the goblin is his shoulder, neck, and head. He is looking off to the upper right. The colored things on his head are horns. If you understood without my explanation, don't think that I am underestimating your intelligence. It's just that some people have a hard time with this one.)

Pharon is a male chauvinist and also a cannibal. He likes to eat the meat from babies. . . .it's much saltier and more fatty.

Pharon once fell in lust with woman named Ichara. The two of them, hastily, got married. They didn't know much about each other, and hence, Ichara did not know that Pharon's state of mind equaled that of a male pimp. Nor did she know about Pharon's eating habits!

On the same day of their wedding, Ichara got pregnant and had a child by dawn of the next day.

(Goblins of Ichara's kind have to rest an entire day after giving birth, due to the fact that they have them so quickly. While their bodies are healing, they go into a deep sleep from which they can not be woken.)

Meanwhile, Pharon became hungry. Being used to getting waited on hand and foot by all of his women, he wondered why in the hell Ichara was not awake, cooking his food. Pharon neglected the fact that he was 1) SUPPOSED TO BE WATCHING THE BABY and 2) he had plenty of dead baby left overs underneath an iceberg in his cave! He went to Ichara's room and shook her violently.

"Wake up bitch!...." he said. "I want some food!" He screamed to no avail, while completely losing the nice guy front that he had put on till now. Ichara didn't stir. Pharon's stomach growled, and he tried again. Nothing.

"That's okay, babe. . . .you stay asleep. I guess I'll just have to get something on my own!"

Pharon went into his daughter's room and grabbed her up by the feet.

"Ahhhhhh, salt and pepper, on your buttocks, I'll shake....

.......season you to taste the fine meal that you'll make!"

Pharon swallowed her up whole.

When Ichara awoke the next day, she was stricken with horror and grief at her husband's deeds. She chastised herself for not being more prudent when choosing her mate, and quickly decided upon a necessary and most deserved punishment.

(As Ichara didn't know that her husband was a male chauvinist, cannibal; Pharon also had no clue that his wife was once a fairy! Ichara was changed into a loathsome goblin by an evil, witch fairy. Her beauty was taken, but her magic was not!)

One night in Pharon's sleep, Ichara cast an unbreakable spell on him that completely removed his genitalia! (Quite an embarrassment due to the fact that Goblins often go about with no clothes.) She turned it into horns, placing them on his forehead and chin. Pharon was called "DICK HEAD" for the rest of his life........

.......in addition to being known as "the baby murderer with no genitals!"

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All images and text are by Marque Terrynamahr Strickland.